Speak Up, Stand Up, Show Up!

                                                                      

 

The title of this post is the slogan voiced by Rep. Stacey Abrams, Minority Leader of the Georgia House of Representatives.  She delivered a rousing call to Democrats gathered at a well-attended meeting, "Building a Democratic Majority in Georgia".  I had the honor of introducing her and wasn't really aware of what an honor it was until I heard her speak.  Rep. Abrams is a strong, gifted and active woman who represents the best of what Georgians can do if they try.  Her message to Dems was that it is time we let people know who we are by speaking out and going to the polls.  The podium was also shared by State Sen. John Barrow, who has beaten the odds by his re-election in heavily Republican territories, and Rep. Scott Holcomb, a young and enthusiastic legislator who also represents our best interests.

This was a great evening to meet with old and new friends, eat terrific food at the famous Sybil's Restaurant in Jesup.  Attendees included representatives of Appling, Wayne and Ware Democratic Committees, as well as some from Glynn, Liberty and Bulloch Counties.  Former (and hopefully future) candidate Lesli Messinger was there and author/farmer Janisse Ray from Baxley. 

It was a time to believe that in spite of attempts to restrict the rights of women and minorities, demean the POTUS, gerrymander voting districts to ensure Republican majorities and feed Americans a constant stream of lies and hate, common sense and justice might eventually prevail.

 

Inspiring Cats and Murder Around the World by Barbara Ellen Miller Davis Terrell Griffin

I just checked my “stats” on the blogger website and saw, to my surprise, that I had 2 page views from China, and one each from Russia, Austria and Japan.  I don’t know anyone in those countries.  I do have Facebook friends in Indonesia, India, Singapore and Moldova, though.  Apparently they aren’t reading my blog.  I’m pretty new at this and don’t really know how to increase readership.  An experienced blogger tells me that the title can be a draw based on what people google.  I try to have my titles more or less reflect the content, so I have to assume the subject matter is not Google-able.  (I know that’s not a word, but I’m sure it will be in the near future).

So I’m asking myself what topics actually interest Googlers in China, Russia, Austria and Japan?  And Indonesia, India, Singapore and Moldova?  Suppose my title is “Murder in Waycross Georgia—Global Implications”?    Or this one is bound to generate some curiosity:  “My Life as a Double Transsexual Double Agent in the Deep South”.  I guess it depends on how and why people search on Google.  I search for recipes, movie information, people, and at work, for resources for patients.  I also search for words for “Words with Friends” and most recently, rhyming words for a poem.  I have learned that absolutely everything can be found sooner or later. 

We all know everyone likes cat videos.  During a brief stint as a cat owner, I found that cats love to watch videos of birds and squirrels.  So would cats in the title be a draw?  Of course, the other favorite thing (at least on Facebook) is a beautiful scenic photograph with an overlay of an inspirational quote.  I don’t speak other languages, so do people in other countries look for American inspiration?  I’d have to say they’re barking up the wrong tree there; the best we can achieve is poor translations of the wisdom of other cultures.  Right now, Facebook is full of Paula Deen; surely they don’t google her in Austria. 

In Googling myself, I find I am now up there with actresses and singers with the same name.  However, who is really looking for me?  After 3 name changes, what are the odds that anyone would look for my current name?  Maybe if I put all my names in the title? 

I should also probably write more frequently.  I tend to write when inspired; I have a well-structured rationalization for my lack of inspiration:  the daily grind saps my energy, I need complete peace and quiet to write, and the dog is on my lap.  It is logical, however, that the more you write the more readers you will have.

Now that I have given myself a tutorial in blogging, I will try to put these ideas into motion.  Beginning with the title.

                                        

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Shopping List

Age 26 A dozen pizzas and a bag of chips Six-pack of Bud and assorted dips Visine, aspirin and suntan oil One steak, one potato and aluminum foil. Age 35 Brocoli and cauliflower, ready to steam Diapers, wipes and diaper rash cream. Bologna, cheese and a large white bread Lettuce, tomato and Miracle spread Age 47 10 Lean Cuisines and diet coke Greens and tomatoes and artichoke Aged cheese and a whimsical wine Greek olives in a tangy brine. Age 68 Graham crackers, wheat bread, soup in cans Prune juice, decaf, oats and brans Mouthwash, denture cream and Tums Dental floss for cleaner gums. Age 93 Oatmeal, grits and cream of wheat Soup with just a little meat Seltzer water and Depends This is how the story ends.

If You Torpedo My Credo I Will Resort to Aikido

I apologize for the title; it is frivolous; one the other hand, maybe you just browsed the dictionary  (or at least the Merriam-Webster website) to see what I'm talking about.  Maybe the rest of this will clarify the subject--or not
 

I make it a habit to refrain from any comments regarding my job, or the people I work with or for.  This is not really a deviation, but it comes from something that was discussed at a recent meeting I attended.  Normally, I take speeches about inspiration, motivation, and how to be a better human being/employee with a grain of salt.  After all, it’s expected and generally kind of repetitive.  However, this one I took to heart.  I think it just might be age-related, because I have been thinking about things like this on and off for several years.

The topic is a “Personal Credo”.  To me this means the things that define you, your actions, and your decisions.  A statement which, when read by people who know you will elicit a nod of the head and instant agreement.  Which means it’s also a statement that reflects who you really are, not who you think you should be or something you want other people to believe about you.  At the meeting, it was suggested that we share this with our co-workers and our loved ones.  It seemed like a good idea at the time, but now, removed from the aura of the rarified atmosphere of the meeting room, I realize it might just bring forth a lot of eye-rolling and “yeah, whatevers”.

So here it is; I can’t see your eyes rolling or hear your snarky comments (although they are always welcome in print, of course). 

                                                                                   My Personal Credo

1.       Make a positive difference in the world each day.

2.       Never stop learning (I believe brain cells start dying off when you lose interest in acquiring new knowledge).

3.       Everyone deserves the best care their society can offer. (Yes, I mean health care, but I also mean respect and justice).

4.       Family is always the #1 priority.

5.       The parent-child relationship is the most important one in life (I can further expound on this, but I hope the meaning is fairly clear).

6.       How I treat animals is a reflection of who I am.

7.       Honesty of self (By that I mean that it is impossible to avoid all mistruths; sometimes not being completely honest is a better choice; honesty of self means being true to your inner core).

8.       Expect respect (I hope this is self-evident; however, it has taken me many years to learn how to do it).

Ok, maybe you think it’s a little sappy—that’s ok.  I noticed that the Credos of some at the meeting only consisted of 1 or 2 sentences.  I lot of them had something to do with God and Faith.   Mine is long and religion-free, but it feels kind of spiritual to me.  I welcome all comments and would love it if you would share yours with me.  Whether or not you put it into words, I know you have one.

The Furthering of Fathers

Fathers have not had a prominent role in my family history.  I never knew either of my grandfathers; they died long before I was even thought of.  My father outlived my mother by many years; unfortunately for many of those years he was not an easy person to communicate with.  But then, he never really was.  He had bi-polar disorder before the word was coined, but it caused him to suffer lengthy periods of severe depression.  Although there was a long period of time when medication kept him on an even keel, that stopped working in his later years.  While I’m glad he lived close to me for his remaining years, it’s not what you’d call a memorable relationship.  My two children have different fathers; one of those has passed on as well.  I’m very glad my son now has a good relationship with his father and that my grandson has several males to foster good relationships with.

I have given up trying to figure out the root causes, but today it occurred to me that I should explore the whole subject of fathers.  When I was growing up the ideal “Dick and Jane” family consisted of the mother, father, two children and a dog.  We had the first three, but it was never quite the same.  On TV sitcoms and in children’s readers, Mother stayed home and kept house, Father went to some type of office (he usually carried a briefcase) and came home to his smiling family.  No wonder I was a confused child.  My father worked a series of different jobs at odd hours, interspersed with unemployment, mental illness and a few stabs at “learning a trade” (I remember printer and furrier).  My mother also worked a variety of jobs: waitress, factories, and  offices.  My father’s moods, even when not clinically depressed, had highs and lows; there were periods of constant anger, or those of jocularity and intense activity.  Since I didn’t understand this I was frequently in conflict with him over a lot of petty details.  I remember one time I decided not to speak to him for a few days, but he didn’t even notice.

I never doubted the love of either of my parents.  As an adult, I realize my parents went through some hard times and did the best they could. At my mother’s funeral, my father shocked me by making an eloquent speech about her goodness as a person, and that was when my tears really flowed.  But, in the end, there were too many barriers to ever feel truly close to him.

My children’s’ relationships with their fathers were also conflicted and difficult; after years of self-flagellation I’ve learned I can’t change what went before.  What will change is how my grandchildren grow up.  Only one now, but he definitely has a father who will always be close.  I know my son-in-law will be an excellent and devoted father.  In addition to who they are, the attitude towards fathering has changed dramatically since I was a child.

No longer is the father a distant idealized image, who visits and “babysits” his children periodically.  He is expected to be there from birth forward.  There are actually stay-at-home Dads, two-father households, single father households, and grandfathers raising children.  Today I salute my own father, Benjamin Miller, and all those in the role of father everywhere!

Fixed!

It was suggested to me that there should be solutions to all the “Things I Hate” in my last blog.  Of course, that would require that I become very powerful; President or King of the World, perhaps.  In my imagination, that’s quite plausible.

 

Again in no particular order—except I will begin with three things that I didn’t even include but definitely are on my personal list:

1.       People on the grocery checkout line who wait until their purchases are bagged and rung up before digging out the checkbook or change purse and then meticulously either write the check or count their pennies.  Generally these people are 90+ year old ladies who are immune to the scorn and annoyance of those around them.  Solution?  Drones, obviously—not the kind that kill, but just sting a little.

2.       A driver who stops in the middle of the road to have a conversation with a driver going in the other direction.  A handy device to stop this nonsense and get on your way would be a pop up rammer on the front of your car.  Of course, this would not come as standard equipment, but an affordable option on most vehicles.

3.       People who use their cell phones in any way in a movie theater.  Even with the sound off, texting throughout the movie creates a field of twinkling lights that kind of distracts from watching the movie.  Solution?  A sensor that turns the movie off whenever a cell phone is used.  This is followed by the entrance of a really large man who picks up the offender by his ears and removes them from the theater.  This will be an annoyance to start with, but eventually this behavior will cease.  (I do wonder why anyone would pay a ridiculous amount of money to go to a movie and then spend the time texting—I mean, what are they saying? “Yo, dude, I’m at the movie.  What’s playing?  I dunno, but it’s really loud, man!  Oh, no, didya see that?  He blew that dude up man!”)

4.       Combined category:  People who abuse/neglect/hate animals.  Solution?  Tied them to a tree with a bowl of water just out of reach.

5.       People who abuse/neglect children.  Solution?  See #4 above—except, tie them to a post instead of a tree because they don’t deserve the shade of an innocent tree.

6.       Combined Facebook category:  People who post internet myths repeatedly (and ignore the facts), people who share irrelevant personal details (out of any context that anyone but them knows about), and people who rant with misspellings and really bad grammar.  Unfortunately there’s only one obvious solution for that—stay off Facebook. 

7.       Combined prejudice category:  People who think anyone who isn’t American, anyone who doesn’t speak American English, and anyone who is a different color from them is automatically inferior.  My solution?  Drop them in the middle of a third world country with only the clothes on their back—not even a smartphone!  Consider picking them back up in, say, 8 or 9 months.  Kind of a global “Survivor” for idiots.

8.       People with money who think they are better than everyone else.  Solution—give me the money because I really deserve it (remember, I’m omnipotent!).

9.       The poor quality of news in today’s media:  Solution?  All news sources will henceforth be non-profit agencies and as supreme ruler, I will dictate the subject matter.  Bye, bye, Kardashians and Justin Bieber.

10.   Combined category of communication:  This one’s more complex—systems are now rooted in place to ensure that people never actually talk to each other; instead, they have to go through a variety of electronic devices to impart even the simplest tidbit of information (I’m in the hospital with two broken legs and a deadly virus!  Does my insurance cover me?).  The solutions are complex as well.  A good start would be to hire all the people who are currently unemployed to do nothing but answer phones.  Even if they can’t answer your questions, won’t it feel so much better to talk to a human?  See, two problems solved at once!

So, there you have it!  Very soon I will be passing around the petition to have me declared------President?  Queen?  I think Supreme Leader of the Universe will do nicely.

Things I Hate--The List You've Been Waiting For

 

 

In no particular order, just need to do one-stop venting:

-----People who abuse animal.s

--- -Everyone who has an in-ground pool in their back yard and acts like it’s no big deal.

--- -People who continually post on Facebook or send e-mails that have been circulating for years and proved wrong repeatedly—and then ignore you when you tell them the facts.  Two primary categories: horribly disfigured or sick children that will be cured if they get enough “likes”—and 2^nd, all the posts that say that the POTUS is/was a Muslim, born in Africa, anti-American, and lied about wherever he graduated from.

 (Come to think of it, a lot the things I hate are on Facebook—there’s a message in their somewhere.)

-----People who neglect and/or abuse children

-----People who neglect animals

-----Hating animals (either all or just one type)

-----People who rant and can’t spell (yes, Facebook again)

-----Personal conversations on FB posted publicly (last one, I promise!).

-----Racists of any persuasion who talk about “those people” or use racial epithets.

-----People who lump the entire world into two categories, the USA—and every other country.

-----Making fun of every language that isn’t American English.

-----Talking loud in public places on cell phones

-----People with inherited wealth who think they’re better than everyone else.

-----How hard it is to read news these days.  There are fewer and fewer newspapers and the ones that still publish don’t much publish the news.  Web news is geared toward celebrity stupidity; does everyone but me really care about bachelor/bachlorettes, Kardashians, or Justin Biebers latest publicity stunt?

-----How hard it is to listen to radio these days.  NPR is the only station I can stomach and sometimes they beat stories to death—just sayin’.

-----How hard it is to contact a variety of establishments and reach a real live human.  There’s got to be a better system than listening to 9 options, being put on hold, listening to country music for 14 minutes and then getting transferred back to the same number you started with.  Worst offenders are the ones you need the most:  insurance companies, Social Security and other government agencies, technical support and any customer service departments anywhere.

-----people who don’t answer their phones or don’t call you back when you leave a message.

-----People who never or hardly ever answer their e-mail.

-----Store employees who loudly complain to each other about their place of work or finish up a personal phone call or lunch before even looking at you (honest, I was in a store once where an employee was sitting in the front of the store near the checkout lines eating a burrito).

 

 

That’s most of the things I hate, or at least dislike a whole lot.  I know there are people who feel the same way about things I say or do,  and I suppose that’s their right (except they’re wrong!).  Some days it’s like the world is rubbing me with sandpaper.  After an unbelievable amount of years I should be rubbed smooth by now with everything just slipping right off.  It just still galls me to realize there are so many things that I can’t change (as per the Serenity Prayer, I do know the difference—acceptance is what’s difficult).  So pardon me, dear reader, as I clear my brain of toxic thoughts and wait for the new week to begin.